I’m no longer feeling the cruddy effects of lowering my dosages which is awesome. However there are SO many things going on right now in my life to stress me out that I’m totally freaking.
There is a person that I was forced into an interaction with today and… I shook for about an hour afterwards… it really upsets me that someone can get to me like that. It really pushes the point home how abnormal I am.
And now what am I doing you ask? Why I’m listening to the music blasting from next door that is so loud that I can hear it over my children and tv with a fan on… yeah that’s just awesome on my nerves.
I feel like it has to get better some day. I had a good weekend then the weekdays came along and horribleness happened. I want so badly to be positive but it’s so so hard.
Last night I caught myself picking at my new hair growth yet again which means that I’m probably going to have to do another shave and hope that I’ll be able to let it grow in again soon.
I’m feeling much better today! Most of my ick is due to life circumstances not medicine withdrawal! So yay for that.
I’m feeling like maybe I actually CAN do this. Maybe I can get off this medication that I’ve been on for almost 10 years. Maybe I can deal with the effects and still live life.
I’m feeling like life is a little bit better. Yeah I am still hearing the wench next door’s television set and music all day every day but I feel a little less tense a little less anxious. Plus awesome news. We got a lawyer that we can sort of afford to help us with the issues we’re having with a certain person in the position to mess around with our lives quite a bit.
Okay day two was just horrible… so I skipped blogging. I skipped most things. Thank God the girls had no school because I had no get up and go to get them going out the door to school.
I don’t know how many of you have been on Effexor/Venlafaxine. It’s a great antidepressant. It works well for a lot of people. However coming off of it is HORRIBLE. I’ve done it twice before. Once when I was having my first daughter and once when I couldn’t afford it.
The first time I tapered off it and the second time I went cold turkey. Either way it’s not fun. At. All. It’s dreadful really. Jitters, the runs, flu like feelings…and the dreaded brain zaps. I have tried so many times to explain it to people. It’s like…. okay say you turn your head and stop moving. You just stop right? Your brains and everything stop at the same time as the rest of your head. Well when coming off this drug it feels like your brain keeps moving for a couple more seconds and rebounds off the inside of your skull. It’s a combo of dizzy and something akin to an electrical shock.
It’s hard to explain.
Effexor has a short half life so you generally get to experience it if you even miss a dose or are late taking it.
So yeah, this is what’s going on…. it sucks but you know what? In the long run it will be better for me.
Ahem…..BLEH yeah that’s how I feel. Like absolute crap. Better still it was my husband and daughter’s birthday today and I way let them down. I feel sick. I know it will get better but seriously I feel like I have the flu. Ick.